Changing the oil on a BMW R1150GS.

I'm not the most mechanically minded person on earth, so if you need to follow this guide you're probably fucked.

To change the oil on a BMW R1150 GS you will need.

1. A BMW 1150GS
2. Oil, about three and a half litres worth.
3. A new oil filter
4. A 10mm socket and drive thing for socket.
5. A bigish allen key. I dunno what size.
6. An oil filter wrench. The filter is all up in the engine, you need this badboy to get it out and get the new one in.

Take your GS and put it on its centre stand on flat ground. If its not absolutely fucking pishing down outside take it for a wee spin first to warm it up. Warm oil drains better than cold oil.
Put some old newspaper down in case you make a cunt of things and spill oil all over the floor resulting in you slipping later and dropping your bike.

Loosen the four nuts that hold the sump guard on. These fuckers can get pretty badly seized so put some copper grease or something on them. If the rubber mounts break use mole grips or plumbers pliers to unscrew the bastards. 

You should now have the sump guard off and four nuts. Two longish ones from the front with big washers and two smaller ones with wee washers from the rear.

Remove the sump plug to drain the oil out into an appropriate receptical, this will take a few minutes so go and have a beer or a cup of tea or something. I spoke to occasional Mikeworld visitor Paul and his dog Dot for a few minutes.

Once all the oil has finished draining replace the sump plug. Put a new crush washer on it if some spare ones came with your oil filter, the spare crush washers are for you gearbox and final drive plugs. DO NOT OVER TIGHTEN YOUR SUMP PLUG. Remove the old oil filter. Mind, this will be full of oil that with pish out all over the shop so be careful. Make sure the rubber ring from the old filter comes out too. Use some oil to lube the ring on the new filter and use the oil filter wrench to install it. Just don't tighten it up too much. Again, more ballet dancer than sumo wrestler.

Pour your new oil in. I went for this semi synthetic 20w50 from www.opieoils.co.uk. Put three and a half litres in then start your bike. It might knock it's cunt in for the first few seconds before the new filter fills up and the oil gets around the engine. Turn the bike off. Once you're sure there's no leaks replace the sump guard remembering to grease the threads so you don't get seized nuts. Check the oil level glass. If its half full perfect, if not top it up a wee bit. Mind that from top to bottom the sight glass is about a quarter of  a litre so don't go mental.

You should now be back to a scene like this but with oil all over the place. You're bike will appreciate it though.

Perfect.

Keep on rolling....

 A few folk might remember my wee C90 taking quite a hammering at Hamfest earlier this year. The rear mudguard, light and number plate holder were all broken, as were the indicators. I also lost a footrest rubber.
Well thanks to Ed from the C90 Club I now have the majority fixed. He had the parts I needed and for a few beer tokens he posted the bits up. Sweet!

These arrived in the post.

The battle wounds. Poor C90

Naked 90.

Fixed! New baboon style rear end.

I've not fired it up yet. The '90 wasn't running at its best before Hamfest, so its getting a full service, I'll adjust the valves and get a new spark plug for it. I'll get Faithir to chuck the battery on the optimate and get a proper charge in it and I'll get fresh fuel as the tank is nearly empty.
Fucking champion.

C90 'leccy problems.....

The thing about owning one of the most reliable bikes on the planet is that you have to spend loads of time fixing bits of it.

Last night on the way back from night shift I lost dip or main beam. Again. The reason I say dip or main, is that there is no real difference between the two in how far they help you see up the road, they just seem to have different spreads of light. I thought I'd fixed this before by cleaning everything down. All was working fine 'till last night.

Hey, its a lot better than the time the swingarm nearly fell off.......

This blue cable was loose.

I pulled the headlight out and had a wee look. The bulb was still fine, but the blue wire looked like it's connector was a wee bit loose. I squeezed this on a wee bit tighter with a pair of pliers and all was well again. Awesome. After some scientific headlight adjustment the C90 was good again!

UPDATE

I've just arrived at work and it looks like the dip/main is fucked again. Back to the drawing board (and the Haynes manual)

Anyone got any ideas??